Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Six Months Down The Drain

Six whole months of taking a medication that hasn't done anything.  What a waste.  Should have suspected it wasn't doing much, since there were very few side effects.  Sometimes I wonder why I bother.  To think, after all the hassle with the insurance to cover this one, when they were more than willing to cover the ones that kicked my butt, but did manage to keep my cholesterol under control and only cost me five bucks.

Can't begin to explain how excited I am to start a new one!  NOT!  Wish I could suffer through the side effects to get my depression under control.  Can't do it!  Have you seen the commercial for "Intervention" where the girl says - "I love life, just not MY life".  That's sums up the way I'm feeling.  

Sorry for ranting, but sometimes you just have to get it out, before it consumes you.  Don't feel obligated to comment just because you are a loyal follower.  I understand that sometimes there are just no words.  Thanks so much for listening.  

I shall now try to do what I do best, which is read and comment to all of you.  Keep up the good work, I count on living vicariously, through your posts.

24 comments:

Ashley King said...

sometimes there is nothing "right" that we can say, but sometimes knowing that there is someone on the other end who completely understands how you feel is a comforting feeling....

i think there are a lot more people who understand how you feel.... you aren't alone. you're never alone....

i hope something changes for the better REAL soon!!!! sending you all my good thoughts and hugs!!!! =)

Marla said...

Doggone it, I just hate that you are not feeling well. You are one of the sweetest little gals and I truly understand how difficult depression can make your life. I'm here sister! Maybe you need to drive north for a girls weekend of foolishness. :-)

Praying for you and solutions.

Karen said...

A good rant is necessary sometimes. I'm sorry you've had to deal with the frustration and no results, but alteast you are now off a pill that did nothing for you. The new drug might be better, one foot in front of the other, Ms. A.

I can say this because you can't slap me from over there :-)

The Girl Next Door Grows Up said...

My dad takes Xanax for anxiety. It knocks him out!

MamaTink said...

Good luck on the new med!

aLmYbNeNr said...

Well, I'm commenting anyway, dammit! LOL

I've dealt with depression and I still have anxiety over things like school so I can sympathize a bit. I'm glad you're getting your feelings out...I understand how it feels when you bottle it all up and you only do it because you feel like no one will listen. Or when you do spill it, all you get are stares or an uncertain smile or a "hmmm" or "uhuh" (I love my mother, but that's the response I usually get from her...that or frustration). That just leaves you unfulfilled and feeling worse. That's why I decided to start keeping a journal. Some of it I may eventually share on my blog but some will have to stay to me so you all don't know how crazy I am HAHA! The thing is, I've written on scraps of paper so far and I haven't yet transferred it to the journal because of class getting in the way.
Anyway, from someone who can actually understand - you're not alone!

Jimmy said...

Hey Ms A,

You are right sometimes there are no words to cover what the insurance companies and our health issues deal to us, I understand the frustration you are going through, I have one medication that works well for me but the insurance company thinks I can use something else, the Doc agrees with me to stay on whay I am using so with the price change because it's not preferred more than doubled the cost.

I could go on and on but then I would be ranting a post in your comment section :(

Rant all you need because I am on your side here, try to not let it get you down and if it does just rant a little more because I am listening, I guess with that and a nickle you have a nickle but moral support I can give you at no cost :^)

Gigi said...

I'm so sorry to hear that you are suffering. Getting it out does help. You know my email. x

Deborah said...

{{{Ms A}}}

Kristy said...

Hope you find something soon, I know how awful that feeling can be.

Joe Cap said...

Medication is tough...especially because once you start taking something, you pretty much have to keep going forever. Unless, of course, it doesn't work.
I am sorry you had to go through this. I count my blessings every day that I continue to be healthy.
Hang in there!

Jenny said...

I too understand the pain in the butt new medications can be!! Especially after you get your body and mind used to them, you realize they aren't doing anything; at least not anything good for you :-( Hang in there!!!

DrSoosie said...

Of course we are here for you Ms. A to listen to you rant, enjoy your family stories and just be friends and support. Isn't that what blogging is all about? Connecting with people and sharing a piece or different parts of your life and in turn receiving valuable input...that is the best part of it. I am sorry you are in a depression. i have certainly been there and done that. Sometimes it just takes time and sometimes it does take medication. And sometimes it takes both. But having someone listen to you, in my opinion, is the best medicine. So go ahead and rant away!!

Ms. Anthropy said...

Everyone, thanks for the support! Normally, you know I prefer to respond to comments personally, by email if possible. If I try to do it this time, I will just sit and cry. I'm trying not to do that. Please understand. I will try to explain more in a post, soon, if I can get a handle on it. Once again, thank you.

Betty Manousos:cutand-dry.blogspot.com said...

I absolutely understand how you feel.
But you are not alone. You have all of us, and we all love you. Don't ever forget that. I'm so sorry to hear that you're suffering, dear friend.
You are in my prayers, and I'm sending you a Big big hug.
(((HUGS)))
B xx

Marlene said...

Awww...I'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time with this. I hope the new meds can give you a good turnaround so you love life again...and with few side effects if any. :) Hugs to you....sounds like you could use them. xoxox

Pat Tillett said...

Ms. A, you just go ahead and rant to your heart's content. I'm pretty darn sure that we'll all still be here for you.

As to the medication, it's just not an exact science yet. It takes some trial and error to get it right. All the postive vibes I can muster are coming your way.....

baygirl32 said...

Go ahead and rant, roar if you have to.

((Big giant hugs))

Michelle Pixie said...

Oh Ms. Anthropy...many hugs and much love. xxoo

RawknRobynsGoneBlogWild said...

There's little more discouraging and emotional than going through med trials when you're already depressed. I say this with experience, Ms.A. You're NOT alone.
Sorry for my delayed visit, though.
Hugs,
xoRobyn

Tracie said...

Rant it out, girl. That's what blogs are for!

I hope you get on a med that works for you. Sending you hugs and positive thoughts.

Ally said...

i'm just catching up on some blog reading today and am so sorry to hear this. please keep venting to us, we love you and want to know how you are. hugs, kisses, love and good vibes from your retro blogger in nj.

Momma Fargo said...

Ms. Anthropy,

Don't give up. I think it's frustrating when medication or anything you try doesn't work. I know. Been there, too. Keep reading and researching and trying. It will be OK. Lots of love and hugs your way.

Help! Mama Remote... said...

I know I'm reading this post late. Hope you're feeling better. I hope you get the proper medication & venting is good for you especially when you have readers that encourage you.